Title:  WSHH – The Full Circle

By:  tayryn

Rating:  NC-17

Archive:  my site only

Disclaimer:  ITC owns them.  I just play with them… and make them play with each other.

Summary:  a possibility of what happened during and after the moon leaves Retha.


Notes:  special thanks go to Jaya… a newbie in the Sp99 universe; who when I was on vacation in September received and began watching her DVDs.  She mentioned “Full Circle” and made some comment about the cave scenes, which in turn, sparked a long forgotten idea for an addition to this episode.


This story is the result.


Thank yous are also extended to both Jaya and my sweet sister, Monica for beta’ing!!






“Say that again!”


“You’re pregnant.”


“That’s what I thought you said.”


Mathias watched quietly while Helena stood and slowly began to pace around her office.


“I can’t be.  I… it’s just… the test is wrong.”


“I ran the test several times, Helena.”


“Bob, you don’t understand,” Helena stopped pacing to turn and face him.  “I can’t be pregnant.  I haven’t…” she paused, blushing slightly.  “I haven’t been intimate with anyone since Lee.  I can’t…”


“There is no mistake here, Helena.  The test was done on your blood sample and according to the results you are about two weeks along.”


“T… two… two weeks?”


“About that, yes.”  Bob answered.  “Why?”


“Oh my God…” Helena gasped as an image appeared in her mind.  A forehead far more pronounced than was normal, thicker eyebrows covering eyes with a wild look in them as the owner moved behind her.


Helena?”  Sudden concern filled Bob’s features.  Helena, did something… were you…?”


“No!  No.”  Helena shook her head and smiled at his concern.  “Uhm…” she moved towards the door.  “Put those results in my file for now, would you?”




“I need to go…” she pressed the button to open the door.


Helena, we really should talk…”


“I know, Bob.  I know.  And we will,” Helena said, moving through the door.  “There’s just something I need to do first.  Someone I have to talk to.”


Helena!”  Mathias called after her again, moving to the door just in time to see her leave medical.




The images flowed through her mind… the sounds and feelings as real as if she was still there…


His hands gripping her hips as the rocks beneath the fur she was kneeling on dug into her knees and the palms of her hands.


His grunting and groaning as he moved hard in and against her body, laying claim and marking her as his; her own low guttural moans of acceptance that she was indeed his.


His mate.


The one that would bear his children.




Helena stood outside the door, her fingers dancing nervously against her thigh before she finally pressed the buzzer to request entrance.


Several moments later, a sleepy face greeted her as the door in front of her slipped aside.




“Oh, John… I’m sorry.  I forgot you were taking the late shift this week,” Helena said, frowning apologetically.


John shook his head and waved away her apology.  “S’okay, Helena.  I… I wasn’t really sleeping anyway?”


“Everything all right?”  The doctor in her couldn’t help but immediately reach out to rest a hand against his forehead.  “Do you feel okay?”


“Yeah,” John said, backing away from her hand and indicating for her to enter his quarters.  “Just a weird dream, that’s all.”


“If you’re sure,” Helena said, moving into his cabin.


“I am,” John replied, stepping back in so that the door would close.  He turned to see Helena standing nervously in front of his couch.  “My turn.  Are you feeling okay?”


“Uhm… yes.  I’m fine.”


“Sit down,” John gestured to the couch.  “Can I get you anything?  Coffee?”


“Yes… no!  No thank you,” Helena stuttered out.


John paused halfway to his coffee maker and turned to look at her.  Helena, are you sure you’re all right?”


Helena gave him a look of consternation.  “I… you better sit down, John.”


He moved back to stand in front of her.  Helena, you’re starting to worry me.  What…”


“I’m pregnant.”


John’s knees gave out and he sank down into the chair behind him.  “You’re… you’re…”




“Pregnant,” he repeated, his mind turning inward to process the information.


~ Pregnant? ~


~ How? ~


~ Who’s the father? ~


~ I didn’t know she was seeing… we were getting so close. ~




John shook his head and focused on her.  “I’m sorry… did you say… what did you say?”


“I said that you do realize when this happened, don’t you?”


“No I…” he shook his head.  “Why would I?”


“Why would you?”  Helena leaned forward, her elbows on her knees, a bemused smile pulling at her lips.  “You didn’t hear anything I said after I said I was pregnant, did you?”


John shook his head sheepishly.  “Sorry… I…”


“I know, John.”  Helena nodded understandably and took a deep, nervous breath.  “You… you’re the baby’s father, John.”


“I… I’m…” John’s eyes widened.  “I’m the father?  How?  I mean… how?  I don’t understand…”




“…Retha…” his voice trailed off as his mind was deluged with images.



His hands gripped tightly to her hips, knowing but not caring about the rocks under the fur that was their bed digging into her knees and the palms of her hands as she knelt over in front of him.


His grunting and groaning as he moved hard in and against her body, laying claim and marking her as his; her own low guttural moans of acceptance that she was indeed his.


His mate.


The one that would bear his children.



“Oh… God…” John moaned and buried his face in his hands.  “Oh… Helena… I… oh God…”


Knowing instinctively what was going through John’s mind, Helena got off the couch and hurried over to him, dropping to her knees in front of him.  “John…” she pulled at his hands.  “John, it’s okay…”


“Okay!?”  His head flew up and he met her eyes.  “Okay?  My God, Helena, I raped you!  It’s not okay.”


“You did no such thing!”


“How can you say that?”  John pushed himself out of the chair, stepping over her to start pacing his quarters.  “I… I was there, Helena… I…”


“Are you saying that you lied two weeks ago?  That you can remember everything that happened during our time on Retha?”


“No.  I’m not saying that.  I can’t remember all our time there… you know that.”




“But I’ve been having these dreams… seeing these images…” he stopped pacing to turn and look at her.  “I see us… our cave-selves…”


“On the fur… in the back of the cave…”


“Taking you like… like some rutting animal in heat…”




“Forcing you to submit…”




“Not giving you any chance to resist…”




John stopped his rant, watching as Helena got to her feet.


“It wasn’t romantic, John… I won’t say that it was,” Helena started, slowly walking towards him.  “But you did NOT rape me.  You didn’t force me.”


Helena… I…”


“No, John… you didn’t…” Helena shook her head, stopping within arms reach of him.  “It was… it was what it was for the situation we were in,” she stepped a little closer.  “We’d regressed, John.  Changed… gone back almost forty thousand years in our evolution… what we did…”


“What I did…” John said in a quiet voice laced with pain and regret.


“What we did,” Helena repeated, meeting and holding his gaze.  “Was natural for us as we were in that cave.”




“No buts, John,” Helena interrupted.  “I’m remembering bits too… having flashes of the two of us in that cave.  And despite the fact that it was…”




“A little rougher than I’m used to,” she continued, giving him a look.  “For the people we were at that moment, it was right.  I submitted to you.  Willingly.  I was yours for the taking.”




“I wanted you to dominate me… to take me,” Helena told him, stepping closer.  “I wanted nothing more than to be your mate, to bear your children…” she reached for his right hand and pulled it against her abdomen.  “And I am.  I’m carrying your child, John.  I’m going to have your baby.”


“How can you want to?  How can you,” John pulled his hand away from her body, stepping away from her.  “…even stand to let me touch you… knowing how I…”


“Dammit, John!  You didn’t rape me!”  Helena ground out forcefully.  She took a deep breath before continuing.  “I know you would never do that… especially to me.  Not after how close we’ve grown these last months since Breakaway.”


“I wouldn’t… I would sooner take my own life than hurt you in any way, Helena,” John admitted quietly.  “But…”


“John,” Helena once again closed the distance between them.  “Why can’t you believe me when I tell you this?  You didn’t hurt me.  You didn’t rape me.  It wasn’t…”


“What?  It wasn’t us?  Is that what you were going to say?”  John asked, stepping away from her again to start pacing.  “It was us, Helena… it was us in that cave.  Us having sex like two animals…”


“Listen to yourself…” Helena interrupted him.  “It was us in that cave.  It was us having sex like two animals,” she repeated his words but made no move to get close to him again.  “You’ve finally gotten it right.  Us.  Not you attacking me.  Us, John.  You and me.”




“No!  What happened, happened, John.  But it wasn’t rape.  Yes, it was rough.  Yes it wasn’t the greatest sexual experience of my life, but it was us.”


They held each other’s gazes for several minutes, John breaking the visual connection first as he dropped down onto the couch, burying his face in his hands.


“I never wanted… hurting you is the last thing I ever wanted to do… but I couldn’t…” John’s words were muffled against his hands.  “I can remember more now… the need to have you… to possess you.  No one else but you would do and no one else could have you.  You were mine and mine alone.”


Helena quietly moved closer, easing herself down onto the couch beside him as he continued.


“I could smell you… your scent was everywhere in the back of that cave… your…” John lifted his head, his eyes wide as they met hers, his voice soft as he finished, “Your arousal…”


“I came to you willingly.  No other male would have been good enough,” Helena said in a quiet voice.  “I…”


“You made the first move…”


“Only the strongest male… only you… would do…”


They held each other’s gazes.


“I didn’t…” John began, his voice quiet and laced with relief.  “I didn’t force you.”


“You didn’t,” Helena told him, a soft smile forming on her lips as she reached and grabbed his hand, pulling it to rest on her stomach.  “And together we created this little life.”


“Oh, Helena…” John flexed his hand against her before gently pulling it away from her.


“John?”  Helena watched in confusion as he stood, pacing yet again.  “John, what is it?”


“We haven’t even properly kissed yet, let alone made love and we’re having a baby.  It’s all so…” Helena’s laughter cut him off and he turned to face her.  “What’s so funny?”


“You are.”




“Yes, you.”


“What’d I do?”


Helena’s laughter quieted down to soft giggles as she shook her head.  “You go from one extreme to the other, John.”


John felt his skin flush, knowing she was right.


“So why don’t you come over here and correct the matter.”


“Which part?”  He asked, watching Helena’s green eyes grow dark and smoky.




A gentle smile pulled at the corners of John’s mouth as he regarded her, the flush on his skin no longer due to embarrassment.  He slowly walked back over to Helena and knelt before her.


“You are so… beautiful,” John said in a whisper, lifting his hand to brush his fingers against her cheek.  “So very beautiful… and I’ve wanted you from that first moment I saw you.”


Helena shivered at the intensity of his gaze, his normally bright blue eyes having darkened to a dark cerulean, clouded with desire.


John’s hand cupped her cheek as his fingers slid into her hair, his other hand coming up to trace his fingers over her lips as he leaned closer.  Helena…” he spoke her name softly as he brushed his lips against hers.  “I love you, Helena,” John murmured, covering her mouth with his, moving his lips softly over hers, his tongue flicking out to tease and taste her lips.


His declaration ringing in her ears, Helena moaned at the feel of John’s lips on hers and opened her mouth to his seeking tongue.  Her hands clutched at his shoulders as the kiss slowly deepened, their tongues meeting and tangling sweetly, learning each other’s feel and flavour.


Both relished and lost themselves in the sensations of their first kiss, parting breathlessly several long moments later when the need to breathe superseded all else.


“Ooh… oh my…” Helena sighed, her forehead resting against John’s.  “I always suspected with those wonderful full lips that you’d be one hell of a kisser.”


John chuckled softly and lifted his head from hers.  “You’re pretty damn good yourself.”


Helena smiled, trailing her hand up from his shoulder to cup his cheek, her thumb moving back and forth over his lower lip.  “I love you, John,” she told him quietly in a voice choked with emotion, pulling his mouth back to hers, kissing him softly.  “I’ve loved you almost from the first moment we met.”


“And I you,” John smiled at her, his fingers once again moving softly over her face.  “Are you sure…” he began, his voice suddenly serious.  “Are you sure you want me….”


“Oh, I’m very sure,” Helena nodded, sliding one hand down his back to pull him closer, so that he was kneeling between her spread legs.  “Love me, John…”


A loving smile filled John’s face as he nodded.  “I do… I will…” he told her in a quiet voice.  “I am going to make slow, gentle, passionate love to you and together we’ll make some new memories… our second first time.”



She approached stealthily, knowing that he was the one… the alpha male.  Hers.  Her mate.  She would have him… let him have her.  There could be no other.



Helena merely smiled, the hand cupping his cheek sliding into his hair to pull his mouth back to hers for another toe-curling kiss.



He looked up and sniffed the air.  She was there… shrouded in darkness… but she was there.  The one he’d chosen.  He could smell her, the scent of her invading his senses and causing his blood to surge through his veins.  He would have her.  Claim her as his and his alone.



They continued to kiss; still exploring, still learning what each other liked and tasted like.  Their hands wandering, feeling and touching every part they could reach without breaking their kiss.



He slowly stood, waiting, anticipating… and then she was before him.  His mate.  Her scent… her need washing over him.  He growled deep in his throat as he suddenly reached out and grabbed her, pulling her down with him onto the furs that lined his den.



John broke off the kiss, gazing at her momentarily before climbing to his feet.  He offered Helena his hand and pulled her up beside him, slipping his arms around her and lowering his lips to hers in another loving kiss.  As the kiss continued, John bent slightly, scooped Helena up into his arms and carried her over to his bed; laying her out on top of the blankets.



He bared his teeth, his eyes traveling over her fur-clad body before pushing her onto her back and looming over her.  Rough hands grabbed at her, turning her over as she pushed up on her hands and knees.  He grunted as he pushed and pawed at her furs, merely moving them aside, exposing only the flesh needed.



John sat next to her and reached out to undo and remove her belt, tossing it onto the floor then returning to slowly unzip her top; running the zipper down along her arm.  Helena helped him pull the tunic over her head, the top joining her belt on the floor. 


Holding his gaze, Helena reached up and released the front closure on her bra, letting the lacy garment slip down her arms to the bed.  She watched John’s eyes travel down to her breasts and smiled at the sight of his tongue darting out to lick his lips, feeling her nipples harden under his hot gaze.


“I was wrong…” John said in a husky voice, lifting his eyes to hers again.  “You’re more than beautiful.  You’re exquisite.”


“Thank you,” Helena smiled and then sensing his hesitation, reached for his hands and brought them up to cup her breasts.


“Oh… God…” John moaned softly at the feel of her taut nipples pressing into his palms.


“John…” Helena moaned softly when he gently squeezed the supple mounds.  As he continued to knead the tender globes, she reached out to undo and remove his belt, his top quickly following.  Helena ran her hands up over his chest, her fingers combing through the soft hair.  “I’ve wanted to do this for so long… touch you like this…”


John smiled and leaned closer, covering her mouth with his in a soft kiss before trailing over her jaw, along her throat and down her collarbone to her breasts; taking her right nipple between his lips, suckling it gently.


Helena arched into him as her hands slid down his waist, her fingers making quick work of the catch and zipper on his pants.  “…John…”


John released her breast and met her eyes.


“Help me…” she said in an anxious voice, trying to push his pants over his hips.


John smiled and got to his feet; under Helena’s watchful gaze, he stripped off his pants and briefs, his socks and shoes quickly following so that he was standing naked before her.


Helena’s eyes traveled over John’s body, coming to rest on his engorged length standing straight and tall from the forest of black curls between his muscular thighs.  She reached down and began to unfasten her pants.


John’s hands covered hers, stopping her.  “Let me… please…”


Helena nodded and pulled her hands away, watching as John quickly undid her pants and hooking his thumbs in her panties, he leisurely inched them down over her hips and off her legs, tossing them onto the growing pile of clothes on the floor.  Her shoes and stockings followed.


John ran his hands over her bare legs as he stepped closer, kneeling on the bed between her spread thighs.  Helena…” he moaned her name softly as the scent of her arousal wafted up into his nostrils.  His hand trailed up along her inner thigh, stopping just short of the blonde curls covering her sex.


“John… please…” Helena arched beneath him, reaching out to grab his hand and bring it to her center, crying out softly when his fingers finally made contact with her swollen flesh.  “…yesss…”


John grinned and moved his fingers through her slick folds, dipping his fingers into her depths and spreading her arousal around her swollen clitoris, his grin growing as she gasped and arched beneath him again.


“Beautiful… just beautiful…” he murmured as he continued to manipulate her tender flesh; every stroke of his fingers against her bringing her closer and closer to her release.


“John… oh, John… yesss… oh please…” Helena cried out softly as his other hand joined in the sweet torture, two long fingers sliding into her snug channel.  “Mmm… just like that…”


Helena’s eyes closed, savouring the sensations coursing through her body, his talented fingers creating a whirlpool of desire in which she was fast spiraling out of control, yet it wasn’t enough.  She needed more… and she needed it now. 


“John…” she opened her eyes, seeking his.  “John… more… I need you… please…”



He pushed aside his furs then reached out to grab her hips, roughly pulling her back against him.  One hand released its grip on her waist, long enough to grasp his hardened length and position it at her opening.  With a loud, victorious shout he slammed into her, over and over, her low groans spurring him on.



John shifted, stretching his body out over hers, moaning softly as her slim, cool fingers wrapped around his throbbing member, guiding him to her waiting entrance.  He held himself over her, meeting her eyes.  Helenaare you sure?”


Helena smiled up at him.  “Oh yes…” she replied breathlessly, lifting her hips beneath him, taking only the tip of him inside her.  “I am very sure,” Helena reached up with her free hand to cup his cheek.  “Make us one, John.”


“Yes…” John moaned and nodded, his hips surging forward, burying his throbbing length deep within her willing body.  “Oh God…” he moaned, slipping his arms beneath her body; his hands gripping her shoulders as he buried his face in her neck.


Helena gasped at the feel of him buried deep inside her, stretching and filling her as no one had ever before.  She clutched at his shoulders as her body strove to accommodate his girth.  “…John… oh…”


John dropped a kiss to her neck then raised his head to meet her eyes.  “I love you, Helena…”


“I love you too…” Helena replied, sliding her hands down his back to grasp his rear, arching slightly beneath him.  “Now… make love to me…”


“With pleasure,” John smiled, pulling himself out of her and then slowly sinking back into Helena’s welcoming body.



He continued to slam into her, over and over, harder and harder until he was howling with pleasure.  She was his and he made sure she knew it, every thrust of his hips against her backside plunging his hard member deep into her tight body telling her so.  Her soft moans and cries fueling his ardor.  No one else would have her, not now, not ever.



They moved together, their bodies finding and matching an intimate rhythm.  Gasps and moans of pleasure echoed throughout John’s quarters as they brought each other closer and closer to the precipice of ultimate rapture.


Helena…” John gasped, raising himself up on his arms and looked down at her face; her eyes closed and her mouth open as she panted for breath.  Helenalook at me.  Open your eyes, honey…”


Helena’s eyes flew open, meeting and holding his.  “John… oh yes…” she arched her hips against him, meeting his thrusts.  “John, I’m so…”


“Wrap your legs around me,” he told her as his thrusts began to grow shorter and faster.


Helena did as he asked, wrapping her long legs around his waist, crying out as the change in angle allowed him to press deeper within her.  Her hands gripped his shoulders as he began to move faster; his hips thrusting harder; moving his throbbing length in and out of her willing body.


Helena…” John groaned her name, feeling her inner walls beginning to quiver around him.



He thrust against her several more times and came with a roar; his seed spilling deep within her body in long, jetting streams.  He collapsed heavily against her back, forcing her body onto the ground, uncaring of her pleasure.  His seed had been planted.  She was his… his mate… he growled softly against her ear, his hips jerking slightly against her in a residual tremor.





“John… please…” Helena cried out to him.  “So close…”


John slipped a hand between the closer press of their bodies, his fingers seeking out and stroking her clit.


“Oh YES!  Oh yes… John!”  Helena bucked under him, her orgasm exploding over her in a rush of pure pleasure, the sensations cascading through her body intense and overwhelming.  “Oh… John…”


John continued to thrust and stroke her, lengthening her orgasm until Helena lay quivering beneath him.  Once he was satisfied of her pleasure, John slid his arms beneath her, gripping her shoulders as he once again buried his face against her throat and began to thrust heavily inside her.


Helena whimpered softly, moving with him as best she could, her hands stroking up and down his sweaty back, urging him on to his release.  “John… love…” she whispered against his ear.  “…come…”


John groaned, his arms tightening around her as his control slipped.  Helena!”  He cried out her name against her skin as his orgasm consumed him; his hips thrusting uncontrollably against hers as his seed spilled deep insider her willing body; splashing against her already full womb.  “Oh… God… Helena.”


John sank bonelessly on top of her, snuggling deeper into Helena’s embrace, sporadic tremors wracking both their bodies.  After several minutes, John became aware that Helena was speaking softly against his ear and focused on what she was saying.


“I love you…” she repeated over and over in a soft voice.


John lifted his head, brushing his lips over hers.  “I love you too.”


Helena smiled up at him then sighed as he slowly withdrew from the warm haven of her body and rolled onto his back.  She turned and cuddled up against his side, laying her head on his chest and throwing a leg over his.


“Mmm… that was wonderful,” Helena sighed contentedly against his chest.


“You took the words out of my mouth,” John replied, his fingers tracing up and down her back.


“So… no more beating yourself up over what happened on Retha, right?”




“John,” Helena warned, starting to sit up.


John’s arm tightened around her.  “I wasn’t going… you’re right.  It wasn’t rape.”


Helena settled back down against him, her hand once again rubbing over his chest.


“So… we’re having a baby.”  John said, his free hand slipping between them to stroke her abdomen.  He smiled at Helena as she lifted her head to look at him.  “A baby.  You and I.”


“Yes… we’re having a baby,” she confirmed.  “Are you… are you okay with it?”


John’s smile grew and his eyes sparkled.  “Oh… I am very okay with it,” he told her.  “I’ve always wanted children and having a child with you…” John trailed his hand up from her stomach to cup her cheek.  “With the woman I love…” he inhaled sharply, his eyes suddenly filling with tears.  “Oh, Helena… I am very okay with it.”


Helena smiled, her eyes bright with unshed tears.  “I’m so hap… oh, John…” Helena lowered her lips to his in a loving kiss.  “I love you.”


“I love you too,” John told her.  “And our little one.”


They shared another soft kiss.


“Move in with me… marry me?”


Helena’s eyes widened.


“Not just because of this… because of the baby,” John told her.  “I swear to you that isn’t the only reason.”


Helena smiled.  “I know.”


John shook his head at the amused twinkle in her eyes.  “So does that mean…?”


“Yes,” Helena nodded.  “Yes I will move in with you and yes I will marry you.”


John grinned and pulled her on top of him, his lips hungrily seeking hers.  They kissed passionately, their tongues dancing sweetly as they explored the now familiar recesses of each other’s mouths.


Helena broke off the kiss and slowly eased herself up so that she was straddling him, her hands grabbing and pinning his arms to the mattress.  “Now,” she said, her eyes glinting with barely concealed laughter.


“Yes?”  John asked, his eyes traveling down her torso then back up to her eyes.


“About Sandra…”